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I Had It All Man

A man is complaining to a friend: "I had it all, money, a
beautiful house, a nice car, a great motorcycle, the love of a
beautiful woman. Then it was all gone!"

"What happened?"asks the friend.

"My wife found out!" replied the man

 

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When Caught By Cop
A cop pulls a young guy over:

"Hello officer" said the smart aleck kid.

"Young man did you see that stop sign?" asked the cop.

Yup, but I didn't see you!

 

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Stop Joking

Dad: Son, this time I expect 80 percent marks in your final
examination.

Son: No dad, I'll manage 100 percent.

Dad: Don't joke with me.

Son: Who started it, dad?

 

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Life Starts with Milk Bottle....
Grows with Coke Bottle....
Habituates to Liquor Bottle....
Ends with Saline Bottle..

 

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Anything For Home
Teacher : whoever answers my next question, can go
home.

One boy throws his bag out the window

Teacher : who just threw that?!

Boy : Me! I'm going home now

 

Rating

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Brave Man
One day,
I Kicked lion's face
I puld tigers tail
I broke cheetas leg
I threw elephants

Than What Happen

then TOY SHOP OWNER kickd me out.

 

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Breaking News
In a car race, NANO beats FERRARI. After some tests, engineers understood that while Schumacher was driving Ferrari, Nano was being driven by RAJNIKANTH!

 

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Tribute To Boozer
After decades, BEER Will be CHEAPER than PETROL !!

Than , there will be new slogan

"Just Drink - Dont Drive"

:) Cheers!

 

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American's Japanese, Britishers and Indian's
Americans fart and say " Excuse me!"..
Britishers Fart and say "Pardon me!"..
Japanese Fart and say "Forgive me!"..

And

Indians Fart and say "Who Has Done This"

 

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He Never Get Tired
Owner to servant: You told me that you never get tired of work. But I have caught you sleeping third time in a day.
Servant: That's the reason why I don't get tired sir.

 

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Great Husband
Wife:If I am lost somewhere, what will you do?

Husband: I'll give ad in newspaper: Be happy, where ever you are.

 

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Anniversary In African Jungle

Wife: where'll you take me on our 10th anniversary?

Husband: We'll go to African jungle safari.

Wife: Nice. And on our 25th anniversary?

Husband: I'll bring you back.

 

Rating

1 2 3 4 5

Nobody Knows
I Love walking in the rain because nobody knows I'm crying
(uhh OLD Story)

New Version

I Love walking in the FOG because no one can SEE I'm SMOKING

 

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Bad Habit Of Scrap Dealer
Wife: You say I look old but one of your friends still praises me?

Husband: Must be Peter?

Wife: Yes but how do you know?
Husband: He is a scrap dealer

 

Rating

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Trustworthiness rule

A boss was telling an applicant the two main rules of the company

He said, "Our 2nd main rule is cleanliness.
Did you wipe your feet on the mat before coming in?"

The applicant replied, "Yes sir! I did."

Then the boss said,
"Our 1st main rule is trustworthiness.

 

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Daddy Have You Ever Been To Egypt

Son : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
Father : No. Why do you ask that?
Son : Well, where did you get mummy then?

 

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Boy Teaching His Girl Friend
A boy friend who is good in English, is teaching his girl friend about tense.
Bf:- YOU LOVE ME. Which tense is it..
Gf:- PAST TENSE

 

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Do You Believe In Life After Death
Boss to an Employee: Do you believe in life after death?
Employee: Certainly not! There's no proof of it, he replied.
Boss: Well, there is now.
After you left early yesterday to go to your uncles funeral, he came here looking for you.

 

Rating

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Photograph Of Wife
A businessman entered a tavern, sat down at the bar, and ordered a double scotch on the rocks.

After he finished the drink, he peeked inside his shirt pocket, then he ordered another double scotch.

After he finished that one, he again peeked inside his shirt pocket and ordered another double scotch.

Finally, the bartender said, "Look, buddy, I'll bring you drinks all night long. But you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order another."

The customer replied, "I'm looking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, then I know it's time to go home.

 

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'END OF THE WORLD'
Which Was
Scheduled For
2012 December Has Been Postponed To 3012
Due To
Some Technical Problems !!!
Please Co-operate & Continue With Life & Same WIFE/GIRLFRIEND ...
Till Further Notice

 

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