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English Man : What is this?
Dukan Dar : This is Dahi
English Man : What is Dahi?
Dukan Dar : Milk Sleep at night and Morning become tight..

 

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A man boards a Kingfisher flight from Delhi to Mumbai and takes his seat. As he settles in, he glances up and sees a gorgeous woman boarding the plane. He soon realizes she's heading straight towards his seat. Lo and behold, she takes the seat right next to his. Eager to strike up a conversation, he asks "Business trip or vacation?" She turns, smiles.

 

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ITNI RAAT KO MAKEUP KYUN LAGA RAHI HO?
PHONE KO FACE LOCK SE LOCK KIYA THA AB WITHOUT MAKEUP UNLOCK NAHI HO RAHA.

 

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Why Love Maariage is better than arrange
Because "A Known Devil is better than an unknown Ghost"

 

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At late night wife's smartphone beeps. Husband checks her mobile and gets angry. He wakens his wife. Husband (angrily); who is this person saying beautiful??? Surprised wife checks her mobile. Wife (double angrily): hey. use your spectacles. It is not beautiful. It is battery full.

 

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What is the height of Misunderstanding?
Man marrying his own secretary thinking that she will still follow his orders as before...

 

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1 day god erased a men's memory and asked: 'do you remember anyone now". Man replied: Yes my wife name and God Smiled and said: "Reformatted but, still the Virus Is Not Removed"

 

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Dad: Did you pass in the exam? Munni: Our Whole class passed but our teacher failed. Dad: How...? Munni: She is stills teaching the same class..

 

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Teacher: What is a line? Student: A line is a dot that's going for a walk. Teacher: Than what is parallel lines? Student: A dot going for a walk with his girlfriend.

 

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Teacher: Today we are going to talk about the tenses. Now if I say "I am Beautiful"
which tense is it?

Student: Obviously it is the Past tense.

 

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Boy: What do you think about our love
Girl: Try to count the stars in the sky
Boy: Aww... Its infinite?
Girl: No, its waste of time..

 

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Wife: Had your lunch?
Husband: Had your lunch?
Wife: I am asking you
Husband: I am asking you
Wife: You copying me?
Husband: You Copying me.
Wife: Lets go Shopping
Husband: Yes I had my lunch..

 

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A mother and son were walking through a cemetery, and passed by a headstone inscribed 'Here lies a good lawyer and an honest man.' The little boy read the headstone, looked up at his mother, and asked "Mommy, why did they bury two men there?"

 

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A lawyer was walking down the street and saw an auto accident. He rushed over, started handing out business cards, and said, “I saw the whole thing. I’ll take either side.”

 

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A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says, "Lady, it says
here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
The policeman replied, "I don’t care who you know! You’re getting a ticket!"

 

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
His lips are moving.

 

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The Fire Brigade were trying to rescue an Irishman from the 10th floor of a burning building.
Fireman shouts: "Jump and we’ll catch you in this blanket!"
Irishman replies: "Get lost, I don’t trust you, lay it on the floor!"

 

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They say if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen… Which is why I lost my job as a firefighter.

 

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Wife: "Whenever I keep money in my purse, our son steals it! I don’t know what to do?"

 

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Lady (to her doctor): "What l am worried about is my height and not my weight."

Doctor: "How come?"

Lady: "According to my weight, my height should be 7 feet, 8 inches."

 

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