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A man was watching a DVD at home.. and jor jor se cheekhne laga ...
Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!
Ghode par se mat utar.. Pagal mat utar..
Its a trap!! Its a trap!!
you will die..
Wife asked: what are you watching?
Husband replied: Our wedding DVD!!Rating
Husband = Mere marne ke baad kya tum doosri shaadi karogi?
Wife = Nahin, main apni behen ke saath rahungi or aap?
Husband = Main bhi tumhari behen ke saath rahunga .RatingConveying is an art
Wife : I have a good news and a bad news
Husband : I am very busy Just give me good news
Wife : the airbags worked properly in our new AudiRating
Husband : Where did you go?
Wife : Mall for shopping.
H : what did you purchase then?
W : One hair band and 45 selfiesRatingPati : Mohabbat agar andhi hai to shadi kya hai.
Patni : Shadi aankhon ka operation hai.RatingA bank manager without anyone around may find themself a-loan.RatingI woke up this morning with a string tied around my finger and I haven't a clue why I put it there...
I better check my notes, it might be something important!
Now if I could just remember where I put my notes...Rating
A conference call is the best way for a dozen people to say 'bye'300 times.Rating
My wife, a phlebotomist at the Denver VA hospital, entered a patient's room to draw blood. Noticing an apple on his nightstand, she 
remarked, An apple a day keeps 
the doctor away, right?
That's true, he agreed. I haven't seen a doctor in three days.RatingMy mother was rushed to the 
hospital following a serious tumble. There the staff placed a band around her wrist with large letters warning: Fall Risk.
Unimpressed, Mom said to me, I'll have them know I'm a winter, spring, and summer risk too.RatingTeacher: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
John: You told me to do it without using tables.Rating
Teacher: This essay on your dog is, word for word, the same as your brother's.
Student: Yes, sir, it is the same dog.RatingTeacher asked George: How can you prove the earth is round?
George replied: I can't. Besides, I never said it was.RatingThe students were lined up in the cafeteria for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: Take only ONE. God is watching.
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, Take all you want. God is watching the apples.RatingA man talking to God:
The man: God, how long is a million years?
God: To me, it's about a minute.
The man: God, how much is a million dollars?
God: To me it's a penny.
The man: God, may I have a penny?
God: Wait a minute.RatingTwo factory workers talking:
Woman: I can make the boss give me the day off.
Man: And how would you do that?
Woman: Just wait and see. She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling.
Boss comes in: What are you doing?
Woman: I'm a light bulb.
Boss: You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off.
The man starts to follow her and the boss says: Where are you going?
The man says: I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark.Rating"What Is The Biggest Benefit Of Having A Crush In The Same College Where You Study?" . . . . . . . . . Answer: "100% Attendance."RatingA Man And His Family Doctor Accidentally Meets In The Market. Doctor: "How Is Your Headache Now?" Patient: "Ohh, She Is Out Of Town."RatingWhat Is The Best Punishment For A Girl? Give Her New Clothes, Matching Jewellry And Nice Cosmetics And Then Lock Her In A Room Without A Mirror.RatingJohnny asked Jacob for a cigarette. Jacob Says, I heard that you have made a New Year resolution to quit smoking habit.Then Johnny replied, Yes I have decided to quit this habit and I am in the process of quitting, right now I am in the second phase.Then Jacob asked, 'oh really, so what was the first phase?
Johnny simply says 'I have just quit buying cigarettes!!Rating
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