Husband to Wife - You will never succeed
in making that dog obey you.
Wife: Nonsense it's only a matter of patience,
I had a lot of trouble with you at first.
MOST DANGEROUS ALPHABET
WHICH IS THE MOST DANGEROUS ALPHABET OF ALL?
" W "!!
B'COZ ALL WORIES START WITH "W"
Woman and WIFE....!
A teenage gal chatting
A teenage gal was chatting on fb
wid a stranger
Stranger: hey pretty! Cud u gimme ur MSN?
Gal: oh yes sure :)
its - iHaveaBoyFriendAndiLoveHimAlot@getlost.com
Stranger: and mine is iAmYourFather@uaredead.com
Power of Computer
The businessman dragged himself home and barely made it to his chair before he dropped, exhausted.
His sympathetic wife was right there with a tall cool drink and a comforting word.
"My love, you look tired," she said. "You must have had a hard day today. What happened to make you so exhausted?"
"It was terrible," her husband said, "The computer broke down and all of us had to do our own thinking."
Lifty In Emergency
The boss who was on the 25th floor of the building called up the clerk on the ground floor for an important file. Since it was rather urgent the boss told the clerk it was an emergency and that he should hurry with the file. After more than 30 minutes the clerk appears all tired and panting for breath. The Boss asks him why he was panting and what caused the huge delay.
The clerk replies,'Boss when I went to the lift it said 'during an emergency please use the staircase'!!!
A little boy walked up to the librarian to check out a book entitled `COMPREHENSIVE GUIDE FOR MOTHERS.' When the librarian asked him if it was for his mother, he answered "No".
Then why are you checking it out?"Because",said the boy,beaming from ear to ear,.."I just started collecting moths last month!".
What do you get when you play country music backwards?
You get back your wife, your dog, your truck...
Human brain is the most outstanding object in world. Itfunctions 24hrs a day, 365days a year. It functions right fromthe time we are born, and stop only when we enter the examinationhall.
Bring a chit on exam day,
scratch and show it to your nearest teacher and
win free trip to Principal's office and enjoy 3 years vacation at home.
Hurry offer valid until exams only..
HEIGHT of COOLNES: Finishing the paper, coming out of the exam hall, having a Cold Drink & asking ur friend: "Dude, which paper was it?"
Saints and Students
People Who Sacrificed Their Sleep,
Food, Laughter N Forgot
Their Family Were Called Saints.
But Now They are Called
To be a good Proffessional,
always start 2 study late 4 "EXAMs".
Because it teaches u ..
how to manage "TIME" and tackle "EMERGENCIES"!!
New exam pattern
1. General students : Ans ALL questions
2. OBC : Write ANY question.
3. SC : Read ONLY questions.
4. ST : Thanks for coming to exam.
Exam rule of NEWTON:Half of wat u read is waste,
Half of d rest u dnt undrstnd,
Half of wat u undrstnd u wont remembr
n d Half of wat u remembr is nevr asked
Class Rooms are Like Train
1st 2 Benches R Executive Coaches
Reserved 4 VIP
Mid 2 Gen Compartment
N Last 2 R Sleeper Class.
7 things Students do during Exams preparation:
4) Watch Movies.
5) Chat with Friendz.
6) Dream Of Touching Books.
7) Asking Others "Kuch Padha Kya"..
ATTITUDE DURING EXAMS:
They gave me the questions which i don't know,
So i wrote answers which they don't know.
Tit for Tat dis is called ATTITUDE.
Head or Tail
A student grabbed a coin,
Flipped it in the air & said,
“Head, I go to sleep.”
Tail, I watch a movie.
If it stands on the edge I’ll study
Examiner:y r u under tension?
Did u forget admit card,ID,or calculator?
By mistake i have brought tomorrow
exam’s cheating material today.
When we have no idea what to write
in the exam paper n the supervisor comes
says, “please cover your answer sheet”