Profit and Loss
Wife asks: Why is that in all marriages the bride sits on the left & groom sits on the right side.
Husband Reply: Have you ever seen a profit and loss statement?
It follows the same logic. All income is posted on the right side and expenses on the left side.
Facebook: Last seen 8 secs ago.
Wats app: Last seen 4 secs ago.
Text book: Last seen 8 months ago..
Once a man ran to the Doctor,'
My wife accidentally drank some petrol. Now she is running in the house. What should I do?'
Doctor: Show her stop signal.
sir : if any dought ask me
student : sir, in question paper question is there but in answer paper no answer is there
Wife Isn'T In The Car
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"
To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"
Celebrating An Event
An aged farmer and his wife were leaning against the edge of their pig-pen when the old woman wistfully recalled that the next week would mark their golden wedding anniversary.
"Let's have a party, Homer," she suggested. "Let's kill a pig."
The farmer scratched his grizzled head. "Gee, Ethel," he finally answered, "I don't see why the pig should take the blame for something that happened fifty years ago."
New style of break up:
A boy gifted a diwali rocket to GF.
GF: What the hell is this?
Boy: u wanted stars na now sit on dis n get lost!
From his death bed, the husband called his wife and said, "One month after I die,
I want you to marry Samy."
"Samy! But he is your enemy!"
"Yes, I know that. I've suffered all these years; so let him suffer now."
Tim: You know Jim; foolish people believe everything without any doubt.
Jim: Do you have any doubt about it?
You are one very lucky lady!
Manfred is riding a bicycle and he accidently hits an older woman
Johnny: You are one very lucky lady!
Old lady: Why?
Johnny: Usually I drive a truck
A chines couple,
Mr Hua & Mrs Hua
got twin babies after marriage.
They named them, Jo-Hua , So-Hua.
Next year they got one more baby.
They named Ye-Kya-Hua
A Woman Worries Until She Gets A Husband,
A Man Never Worries About The Future Until He Gets A Wife
Great lines By Bus Conductor
"change cannot be given to you everytime."
"You only Must Bring d Change..."
Great lines said by...
An old man's t shirt quote
I am not 60 I am 16 with 44 years of experience
Son: I Don't Want to Go to School
Son: Want to work
Mom: What Work Will You Do With UKG Knowledge.
Son: Take Tution for LKG GIRLS..
Wife : whenever we keep the money in the bags our son steals it,
I don't know what to do?
Husband : Keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them.
Worried man to a Psychologist:
My wife treats me as if I were a dog.
Psychologist: Does she abuse you? Hit you? Starve you?
Man: No worse, she wants me to be faithful.
Entering late in class
having spicy hair color,
I-pod in 1 ear, ph on the other side n saying 2 mam "Hey sweety dont wait 4 me, carry on BABY !"
Boy : You Look Exactly Like My Wife....
Girl : Ohhh... What's Your Wife's Name..
Boy : I'm Not Married Yet... ;-)
Moral : Learn New Methods To Propose.. ! :)
The World Is Changing Everyday
Sir- It Seems You Haven't Studied Your Geography, Why?
Student- My Dad Says, The World Is Changing Everyday
So, I Decided 2 Wait Until It Settles Down..!!