eknazar - desi lifestyle portal
Global
Advertise | Contact Us
My Account
MindsMapped Big Banner Buy Sparkler Big Banner
Daily
pagination
1     36  37  38  39  40  41     47  59  83  
pagination
I Love You
A Women is Sitting at Home on the Couch with her husband and she says "I Love You". He asks "Is that you or Wine talking"? She replies "its me talking to wine".
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

New Born Babies
Three men were at a hospital waiting for their babies to be born. The nurse comes in and tells the first man, "Congratulations, you just had twins!". He said, "That's wild because I work for Twin Gates Electric Company". Another nurse comes in and tells the second man, "Congratulations, you just had triplets!". He said, "Man, that's uncanny because I work for 3M company." Upon hearing all this, the third man gets up from his chair and starts toward the door. The nurse says, "Wait sir, your wife has not had her baby yet. Where are you going?". The man replied, "Hell lady, I'm leaving while I can....I work for 7Up!!".
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Happiest marriagesTwo bachelors were talking about their respective choice of life partner. One friend said,'It is generally said that people with opposite characteristics make the happiest marriages. What is your opinion ?

The friend replied,'Yes, they are right. That is why I am looking for a girl with a money!'
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Beginning of new argument
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.


A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

What do it means?
After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it means?"

"You'll know tonight." he said.

That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams"
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Poor fool thinking about getting married."
"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper."

"What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn't go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking fancy meal!"

"I know all that."

"Then why did you invite a friend for supper?"

"Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married."
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

To be happy with a Man/woman

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

I have great news
The newlywed wife said to her husband when he returned from work, "I have great news for you. Pretty soon, we're going to be three in this house instead of two."

Her husband ran to her with a smile on his face and delight in his eyes.

He was glowing of happiness and kissing his wife when she said, "I'm glad that you feel this way since tomorrow morning, my mother moves in with us."
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

100th birthday
Grandpa John was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how athletic and well-preserved he appeared. "Gentlemen, I will tell you the secret of my success," he cackled. "I have been in the open air day after day for some 75 years now."

The celebrants were impressed and asked how he managed to keep up his rigorous fitness regime.

"Well, you see my wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding night, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had a fight, the one who was proved wrong would go outside and take a walk."
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Some People Don't Even Know You
Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and self- pitying.

She moaned to her mom and brother, "Nobody loves me ... the whole world hates me!"

Her brother, busily occupied playing a game, hardly looked up at her and passed on this encouraging word: "That's not true, Mary. Some people don't even know you."
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Party tonight?
A man and his wife were returning from a party one evening. As the couple was driving home, she asked her husband, "Honey, has anyone ever told you how handsome, sexy and irresistible to women you are?"

Totally flattered, he replied, "No, dear they haven't."

At that point she yelled, "Then what the heck gave you THAT idea at the party tonight?"

 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Red handed
A thief was taking red paint and he was running fast. "Can't spill the paint. " He said as he ran. But he tripped over a rock.

"ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGG NOOOO I SPILED THE PAINT ON MY HANDS!" And the law got him.

"Talk about getting caught red handed!," The police man joked.
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Mysterious tooth
After losing another tooth, young-old Timmy became more curious about the mysterious tooth fairy.

Finally putting two and two together, he came right out and asked his mother, “Mom, are you the tooth fairy?”

Assuming he was old enough to hear the truth, she replied, “Yes Timmy, I am.”

Timmy seemed to take this news quite well.

But as he headed for the door, he slowly turned back toward his mother with a curious look on his face and said, “Wait a minute mom. How do you get into the other kids’ houses?”
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Home Work Teacher: Did your father help your with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Blood doesn't rush to my feet
When I stand on my head the blood rushes to my head, but when I stand on my feet the blood doesn't rush to my feet. Why is this?

B: It's because your feet aren't empty.
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Copy Cats
There are 10 cats in a basket and one cat jumps out. How many are left?

None. They are all copycats!
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Bear Chase
Two guys are out in the woods hiking.

All of a sudden, a bear starts chasing them. They climb a tree, but the bear starts climbing up the tree after them.

The first guy gets his sneakers out of his knapsack and starts putting them on.

The second guy says, "What are you doing? He says, "I figure when the bear gets too close, we'll have to jump down and make a run for it." The second guy says, "Are you crazy? You can't outrun a bear"!

The first guy says, "I don't have to outrun the bear. I only have to outrun you…
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Elephant and Grapes
What sound does a grape make when an elephant steps on it?

None. It just lets out a little wine.
 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

I'm not poisonous
"I hope I'm not poisonous," says the first snake.

Why? asks the second snake.

Because I just bit my lip.

 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

Intelligence come from
A little boy went up to his father and asked:

'Dad, where did my intelligence come from?'

The father replied...

'Well, son, you must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine.

 
Rating
1 2 3 4 5

pagination
1     36  37  38  39  40  41     47  59  83  
pagination
FunAsia


© 2000-2016. All rights reserved eknazar.com
Legal  |   Privacy  |   Advertise   |   Contact Us